11/13/2003

ROTK: circling the drain?

Peter Jackson has cut Christopher Lee from Return of the King.

Now, I'm not one of the hardcore Tolkienistas screaming because Jackson cut Tom Bombadil (a mercy) and the elves aren't chanting Tolkien's (rather vile) poetry in the background of every scene. Hell, I'm actually in favor of streamlining the narrative to increase the visual "punch".

However.

When Jackson started cutting things that are actually vital to the story--and Aragorn's acquisition of the palantir in Orthanc is vital to the story--because he was supposedly having difficulty cramming in the necessary details, and then padded the second film with lingering shots of Arwen's perky breasts, Aragorn's adolescent sulking, and a completely de trop over-the-cliff fake death scene...well, frankly, he betrayed my trust. I can't trust him to attend to the barest details now without fearing how he's going to fuck up the storyline. Surmising--and this is just speculation on my part--that Arwen is now going to be bringing her jagoff fiance his reforged sword sometime in the third film (nevermind the fact that he's supposed to have it before leaving Rivendell), why not just have her and Grandma Galadriel show up with a barebreasted Amazon Elf army at Pelennor Fields just in time to pull the guys' fat out of the fire? And then in the name of "Grrl Power" we can have Eowyn seize the mount of the Witch King, fly to Mt. Doom, take the ring from the failing Frodo's hand and fling it into the firey chasm from whence it came. That should dumb the whole story down nicely.

No, I'm not taking this well, thanks for asking.

[Thanks, Paula.]

No comments: