It's like watching them set themselves on fire.

Pretending to sympathize with Piazza now that the Mets have submarined him regarding a move to first base, Bob Klapisch actually seizes on the opportunity to advocate trading the Mets' best player to the AL--for the good of the team, of course. (See also Mike Lupica's recent column, which was badly written enough to have been written by Klapieceofshit himself. And can I just ask, is it even possible for Lupica to write a column on the Mets without forcing it through a pinstriped filter first? How does a column ostensibly written about Piazza suddenly become an advocacy piece for the flailing Giambi?)

There's plenty of blame to be apportioned for the current fiasco. To Howe for being so incredibly inept at handling the media (at the moment I’m not ready to attribute to malice what can be reasonbly explained by wretched stupidity.) To the NY press for raising their annual hue and cry about Piazza moving to first to a fever pitch due to the team’s abysmal start—like forcing him to move to first is suddenly going to make everyone else do their jobs. And most of all, to the Wilpons and GM Steve Phillips for not addressing the situation during Spring training, when it would have behooved them to have Piazza start working on making the move. It’s not like this is a novel idea; it’s been bandied about since Piazza came to the team in ’98 and they got a good look at his throwing arm.

The fact is, Piazza is not a great athlete. He’s a great hitter, and God knows he tries, but he’s not particularly gifted, physically. He doesn’t know where his feet are most of the time. Moving him to first base isn’t going to be like moving Biggio to second, or even like moving Zeile from third to first. It’s going to be like moving Hundley to left field. And the people who witness it—particularly if they force Piazza to move mid-season—are going to be brutally judgmental; Mets fans are not known for their deep sympathy and sweet, understanding natures. The NY press, who love nothing better than a good feeding frenzy, will call for a trade—as Klapisch and Lupica have already done—and the team, who apparently see nothing wrong with letting team policy be driven by public opinion, will trade the best hitter they’ve ever had, most likely for a handful of magic beans, to appease them, bringing what was supposed to have been a golden era to a sad and tatty end.

Every year they make it harder to stand by them. Every fucking year.

Embracing my inner geek.

Via Variety (login may be required, I'm not sure), Indiana Jones will be coming to DVD on Nov. 4th. Pertinent factoids: 4 disc set, all 3 movies. THX digitally remastered, wide- and full-screen versions, Dolby 5.1 remastered soundtracks. $50 anticipated pricetag. Disc o' goodies with interviews, possible deleted stuff.

It's good to be the king.

Also via Drudge, Prince William wants to come live in the US for a couple of years, putting his art history degree to use at an auction house. Article chiefly notable for the mention of his pickup line, "Hi, I'm the future king, wanna pull?"

I was going to say it couldn't hurt to have Britain's monarch on our side in a crisis, then I remembered they don't actually do much of anything useful. But what the hell; it couldn't hurt his character development to have a real job, either.

Looting the UN cafeteria.

I'll just say this: I want Kofi Annan presented with the bill for all the stuff that was stolen, including the silverware. Fucking ridiculous behavior. [Link via Drudge.]

Nailing Norman.

Dennis Miller examines Norman Mailer like something he scraped off the sole of his shoe in the WSJ opinion journal.